3 Mar 2011

the imaginary, pretend friend

Recently on one of our field trips to a remote village, we found a vending machine which dispenses toys. All you have to do is to put in 50cents, and walla, a brand new toy (a tiny one!) is dispensed. So I gave my 2 darlings some money and they each tried their luck.

a drawing of Sneaky.
 (too lazy to grab my
camera now)
 My dear Nell put in her coin and out came jewelery, a pretty piece of necklace. My little Jd put in her coin next, and out came..a tiny plastic mushroom with eyes that look kind and a mouth that's always smiling. Then we walked down to the pier to watch some fisherman fishing. After a while, Jd got bored a little, so we sat down to play with her mushroom, which she named "Sneaky."

Naturally, I had to become Sneaky's voice. Then Play time over, field trip ended, we went home.

The very next day, she brought out Sneaky and asked if she could talk to him. I obliged. But the following nights, she'd do the same, bringing Sneaky out to talk to him, and I admit I began to get tired pretending to be Sneaky, coz Sneaky's got a high squeaky voice, and I've created him in such a way that he's terribly caring, loving and patient.

That's hard to be when this mum here gets overworked and cranky some days. And once Jd misplaced Sneaky and went crazily searching for him while wailing on top of her voice. I began to regret creating Sneaky and told her (in a very loud, frustrated voice) that it was JUST a TOY!

She replied "no mum, he's my friend. He's patient, he's kind and he never scolds or shouts."  I kept quiet, realizing how impatient I can get on some days.

So we hunted around till we found Sneaky.   Once found, we sat down and I resumed the personality of Sneaky. I found it interesting how I can sometimes get information from my daughter about ME, through that little toy. I learnt that my daughter needs more one on one time, a more gentle way of talking from me and more patience.

Sometimes patience is hard, especially on days where I teach piano half day, do house chores and cook. It's hectic and piano students who've not practiced can drain my patience faster than anything else, and leave me little for my own children . I guess, I've just to either cut down working time, or pray that God, from whom I draw my strength will give me more patience for my own children who are dearest to my heart.

1 comment :

gail said...

I relate to you so much, Martha. Truly.

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