I will not be a Kiasu (competitive) parent

My children exploring

Dear reader..thank you for reading my blog posts..it's wonderful knowing you'd actually come by to read my boring ramblings and updates about stuff we've been doing around here.

Feel free to peruse, but please do not compare between us. You and I are different. If you're a parent, it's most likely we've different parenting styles, different personality traits, different perception of education, values, talents, ...we'd have different strengths/weaknesses, for no one is alike.



You get the picture, You and I are different. My strengths may be your weaknesses, and if that is so, then most likely your strengths will be my area of weakness. Feel free to copy  projects, if there are any worth copying, as I too often get ideas from other sites. But whatever you do, please do not gauge your children or your accomplishments by mine, do not compare. For no matter what, we're not the same. I too will not compare, for I'm just living my own world, plodding along with my girls (and hubby) a day at a time.

Once (like many Asian mothers) I used to worry "Am I doing enough?", "Have I accomplished all that's to do?" "Oh boy, his/her kid is already doing such and such, I have to push my child a little more."  "Oh my goodness, what?? Her child is already doing Grade 5 music?" Darn.... push push push....PUSH, despite howls, protests, melt downs, parent/child fights..PUSH!!!

Now, I just let it be, coz my child is NOT that child, and I realise, it's really not about doing "Enough." It's really about enjoying my parenting days, enjoying my children and learning along side.  It is observing my children, in trying to understand them better, their personality, their thoughts, their strengths, their weaknesses. It is about helping to develop their strengths further so they can excel in their element. It is also in helping them find a balance in life.

I'm happy I've managed to get the "kiasu"/competitive kinda thoughts out of my head now, and we're all happier. :)  :)

Seriously, and truthfully...life is an endless road of competition. It's a crazy world out there...who gets to climb the ladder first, who's top in class, who has the best dress, who's the brightest kid,  who can play the piano well, who's aced in math etc etc. It's Endless!!! Endless and often destructive causing depression in many children.  Sadly, a life of endless competition, not for the child's sake but for the ego of the parent.
                            
I've decided that the only competition my child will have for now will be in sports, that is when the swimming instructor initiates one. As for academic purposes, talents, reading skills and all other things, I'm gonna HANG IT!  Not hang the education, LOL, but Yeah, hang that competitive bit and allow my child to go at her own pace and enjoy the process of learning.
           
There's a whole life time of learning in front of them..why not allow them to enjoy it and to love what they learn instead of doing it for the sake of some exams just to see what position they are in class.

Let's get back to the beginning. You and I are different. Therefore, our children are different. There's no point competing in education, because our children will have different learning styles, different strengths, different talents, different in every way. Let them explore different paths and find their own conclusions. Allow them to love learning, allow them to love exploring, allow them to find their own strengths instead of trying to shape them into becoming something else.

See...it's another boring ramble here...Anyway...yeah..just my thought about life as a parent.