11 Feb 2012

Journey (Morning Ramble)

As the impending gloom of the no.40 draws nearer (well...not for another 10 months) I notice the changes that have happened in my life and the lives of friends around me. Life has inevitably changed us. Some of us have managed to steer it in such a way that things are way better than they were. Some of us are somewhere in limbo, lost without direction, searching for meaning. Some of us have gone into rough waters with no safety ground in sight. Some of us....(the list goes on.)

Just last week as I watched my daughter at swim class, I (and my bro) looked enviously at the teens. Lean, toned bodies, full of energy, vibrancy and strength. Ah....if only I was there again. One of them wanting to get something near me said 'Excuse me aunty, I need to get my bag." Dang, I thought, I used to be you! you!! you!! Now I'm an aunty???"

Remember how as teens we used to think adults were dull, uncool with too many precautionary words? Adults were people who didn't understand? *sigh*  I know, some teens probably think me that way now, coz suddenly, I'm no longer the teen, but that "dull" adult. I think in my head "Hey energetic wonderful teen, frolic all you want and can, but do not look down on the wise words of the dull, and most of all, in a snap of time, you'll be in my position..and I??  *gulp*"

I've gone off topic....(morning ramble...remember?)  So now, back to the lives around me. Life impacts us in many ways. There's no pure state of happiness in life (so if you're on a journey seeking pure happiness and peace, you can give up now.) but a mix of emotions. Inside us, there are a variety of feelings and states that complement and oppose one another. It's the clash of thoughts and emotions that bring tension that's sometimes  hard to relieve. From issues such as global environment to country's politics to family affairs...suddenly we are aware and involved in all these, unlike the teen who thinks he has too much to carry, when really it's just homework (and parents.)

For some of us, we try to handle it  as we tarry. For some..they are able to ignore it all and continue happily :) (yes, the positive thinkers, and believe in laughter people). For some..it has brought them to depression...and some (sadly) towards the path of no return where the mind becomes a wanderer lost in the world of hallucinations.

But we all started almost the same, innocent babies in the womb of our mothers. I'd like to stop my meaningless, meandering ramble here. I'm grateful for my family that keeps me sane, (though at times I think otherwise, esp pertaining to kids), but most of all....as I conclude, I think...it's not me, but God who keeps me going. When days go by without God...  I sometimes feel a darker cloud looming above, the friction of mixed emotions increasing within me and I get agitated, restless.

And snap...I remember........of course, silly me....only the storms in life can be calmed by my Maker. I'm reminded right now as I write..to sit at His feet, listen to HIs voice, and let Him carry my burdens. For life's journey cannot be traversed alone, but only with the help of an Almighty God.

So where am I in my course of life? Ah...that's my secret...but if you ever think I'm "going off" already in my head, then please caution me, tell me before I go off the edge. :)  Happy Weekend people. Remember..stay close to your Maker. :)




marie said...

I know exactly of which you speak. Now that we're adults the grown ups are the cool ones, although with less energy. When I look at how my kids can go, go, go it amazes me and I realize I am not so young.

But to stay positive and happy we have to count our blessings and,like you said, stay close to our Maker. He really does bring peace and comfort to our soul.

gail said...

Himself tends to envy youth to the point of bitterness. I often regret choices I made in my youth. However, the knowledge that we will have eternity with He who created us for His own joy can get me through the hard times. I am so happy we will be there together, dear Martha!

Divoo said...

"been there, done that." - that's what we think or say when we see today's youth. and when we see them, we do think about the older times and think what we made of them. the mistakes that we made can serve as a good learning for our kids and prevent them from doing the same... good to read some different kinda notes this time. :)

Carolyn (Lil' Dahling) said...

hello Martha,

I've dropped you an email..:)

Martha said...

i need to have a "like" button under yor comments! :)

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