28 Sep 2011


This is something I painted today. Feeling uninspired, unmotivated is  a horrid feeling. I walk around feeling listless...itching for something extraordinary to do, longing for something to captivate me and inspire me so much that I wanna sing it, write it or paint it, but nothing comes to mind.

Sure I'm greatly inspired as far as my teaching work with children is concerned, and am GREATly inspired by the continuous work we're doing in the Remote Village. But I'm really "empty" in the inspiration/creative bank. Being a creative person...it's really an unpleasant feeling. I can't quite describe it...it's like waiting for that rainbow or something "wowzers" to hit me that makes me want to jump, makes me wanna work till midnight, makes me want to create something. But here I sit, painting stuff like the painting above and the ones below..which is even worse..all painted half heartedly..with no direction, planning or goals in mind. 
Pathetic water lilies?

Perhaps the state of my mind?

And believe it or not....I even sat down and made up this meaningless song...that'll prove further to you, how unmotivated I have been.

I desperately want something to "stir" me..to bring up the creative side in me again..or I'll continue to feel agitated, "lifeless"..with nothing exciting to do, till the next trip somewhere into the jungle. Am I making sense anyway? coz you know, the uninspired me is affecting the stuff I write too. *sigh*                                                                                                                                                                   


Divoo said...

it is natural to feel that way at times, Martha... we all know that :) i'm feeling the same since two days, in spite of the fact that San turned two last Friday and we had a great birthday party for her! :) maybe, a good nap or a good book can cure this feeling! :)

Divoo said...

just listened to the 'meaningless song' that you made up... you always amaze me with your talent! you sound nice. :)

gail said...

Oh, Martha. Are you feeling down in general?

Look at the picture I posted of the "fetus" holdiing the surgeon's finger and maybe that will motivate you.

(((((Martha))))) Love you.

Kelly L said...

Here's to getting inspired.
I've Become My Mother

Kiddothings said...

I think I know the feeling. It's difficult to describe like you said. I think everybody goes through phases like this. I actually like that song you wrote. It's beautiful music. Well, your uninspired self certainly inspired this post :)

Carolyn lil' dahling said...

*Hugs* You'll get over it. Those pictures aren't that bad. Same goes to the music..:)

Jessica said...

I think your paintings are great even if they were done with no inspiration.

I hope you find your inspiration again soon. I know sometimes I lose mine but it always comes back.

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