I'm feeling better today. For the first time today , the sharp pain in my head each morning is diminishing. It's there but not as severe as the days before. :)
While in the ICU, I had strange dreams and I drew pictures in a sketch book. The nurses were often drawn to my sketches and I wish I could share them with you now, but not yet. Takes time to load and all. Will do soon. In the mean time, here's something I wrote in my diary on the 18th of Sept while in ICU.
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(Abstract from Diary 18th Sept 2012)
My life was on a train that went round in circles, mindless circles. Somehow, one day on a journey, I got pushed out. It was a period of wilderness, worrying, searching, finding.
Then somehow in that wilderness, like a gumball in a machine full of gumballs, I was squished, shaken, pushed through,.... plopping out through a tiny hole.
That's when I found myself on the other side of the world.
I still see the train, I see people in it who are like who I was. But I see them with a whole new set of eyes. It is strange, but I'm on the other side now and I no longer think the same as before.
For the moment it is my time of healing. When I'm done, I will look out for those who've been pushed off the train like me, to lend them a helping hand, and help them realize that they can make it. They can come out whole on the other side.
And then like me, their views of the world will no longer remain the same.
martha@poundthegarlic.blogspot.com 2012
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......of dolphins and whales, mops and pails. Laughter and wails, little ones, great tales. Growing with Guidance. @poundthegarlic.blogspot.com
9 comments :
Hei Martha
Glad to know u r getting better. Wanted to give u call so much but was afraid the call will affect ur rest. Will sms u tomorrow n c the possibility to drop by ur hse for a visit. Meanwhile take plenty of rest n v sure miss u. GB!
Tender, healing hugs being sent your way along with many prayers.
You're a very strong woman. Even have energy to write in your diary while in ICU. Take good care and rest well. :)
Glad to know that you're recovering, Martha. You're strong and it shows in what you write. Get well soon! :)
Martha,
I feel so happy that you are feeling better. You are always on my thoughts. I will continue to image you healthy and happy.
Dear friends, thanks for your prayers and messages. I am encouraged by all of you. :) Well, a few more followups. Today was a visit to the ENT. I have sinus infections now post op which cause headaches daily! I have 2 options, another surgery or medicine first to see if it'll help. I deifnitely picked meds..a little scared of any surgeries for the moment! Yup...still trusting for total recovery. Thanks all. :)
Praying for your healing to continue.
My dearest Martha,
You won't believe how happy I am that you wrote and to read the different stages of recovery you are right now going through. Most of all, to know that somehow as life unravels so suddenly, yet, each and every detail of life is being looked after. I am especially glad to see the kids pulling together through this time with amazing maturity and resilience. What you wrote about seeing with new eyes, I can totally relate to. Somehow, the world has continued to go on as normal while it is we who have changed and have gotten a glimpse of another side of life which transforms us forever. Do allow yourself plenty of time to recover. The first thing I had to learn was to allow myself to slow down - well, I had no choice. But slowly in those moments of operating at a fraction of normal capacity, I began to cherish the slow, unhurried moments and I experienced a clarity and awareness of the present moment, each moment in its fullness. I hope you will not resist the lesson of slowing down. I love you. You are going to get well. And you will change to be a new creation through this. Eventhough, you might be housebound for a bit, I wish you flight to that secret place where you will find yourself. Most of all you will find God like never before. My thoughts and prayers go with you and your dear family. Love, Sharon
Thank you Denise for praying.
Hey Sharon, thanks for your encouraging note. Alas, I'm begininng to be tired of slow paced life and headaches. I was just lamenting this morning and begging for complete wholeness that I may go out. And then I read of the woman in the BIble who was sick for 12 years! I will take your advice on slowing down..and see how I can work it out. Indeed, I think I need to find ways to do that, so I never get on that train again. Thank you for dropping by to day, it means so much to hear from you. With love and hugs to you my friend. :)
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